It’s not hard to imagine what a charismatic person Jesus must have been. He drew large crowds before he ever said a word. He was an energetic, engaging figure as he walked among the most marginalized, invisible people of society. He was the friend everyone wanted; a warm, approachable man who asked deep questions and looked you in the eye. Jesus saw those that others overlooked; he made space for them. I imagine that a friendship with Jesus may never have felt like enough. After all, strangers tore open the roof to get access to him!
Jesus’ connection with women was also unique. Some responded, as Mary Magdalene did, by financially supporting the cohort of Jesus’ apostles and practically supporting through meals or lodging arrangements. Women had a role in the mundane and the spiritual…backstage access, almost, to the heart of the movement. How did Mary Magdalene regard this ‘intimacy of the ordinary’ in her friendship with Jesus?
In the Spiritual Exercises, St. Ignatius encourages each of us, through Ignatian Contemplation, to consider a role for ourselves in Gospel accounts. Where am I standing? How close am I to Jesus? Am I the one that Jesus touches? Every time I find myself in a Gospel crowd, I know to my core that if I don’t open myself up to Jesus he cannot heal me. Looking at Jesus as he speaks to the crowd, he catches my eye, and he does not look away; nor can I. He sees me in a way that I haven’t been seen before. He beckons me nearer, inviting me to trust what he is revealing.
Likewise, Jesus evoked a stirring in Mary Magdalene that she found hard to put her finger on. He answered her questions before she could speak them aloud, he modeled an awareness of others that completely altered her world view. He inspired her to make changes - radical changes - to her life. She’d never met anyone like him.
Just as their friendship was deepening and she was seeing a way forward, Jesus was dramatically and terrifyingly snatched from her life. Accused, tortured, reviled, and murdered in the most demeaning way, he hung on a cross before her. Gasping to express his last words to her, his mother, and his few friends present, Jesus died leaving Mary in a wrenching state of confusion and abandonment. What now?
Her old self would have reacted by withdrawing and nursing her shock and pain on her own, away from others. Yet, a shift had taken place over the last year. It surprised her how strong the conviction was. She knew that she could not stay away and hide herself even if she didn’t know exactly what to do. She felt drawn to his tomb. That was where she would realize what came next.
She almost brushed him away. She was laser focused on the tomb and after she had shockingly discovered it empty, felt bereft of direction. She began to sob, hiccupping in devastation. This is not the way she had seen things play out. She heard a voice behind her, “Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?” Why would the gardener ask her who she was looking for unless he knew something? She replied, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.” I will move heaven and earth to get him. No one better stop me. I’m on a mission, I…
Jesus spoke her name, “Mary.”
Time stopped. Her interior babbling ceased. She looked at him…he who spoke her name in the way only Jesus could. She stretched for him. “Do not hold on to me. Go instead to my brothers and tell them that I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.” What else was Jesus doing here? He trusted Mary. He had seen her growth and the way she pondered and integrated what he taught the twelve. She is ready to bring the first word of his resurrection to his friends. Any doubt she felt faded in the face of his conviction.
Do you feel pressured to do something that you aren’t sure you can do? Pressured in the best sense of the word? Someone who knows you and sees you truly, knows that you are up to the task, and is pushing you to make the effort and try. When Jesus asks, is it any different? He catches your eye, and he does not look away; nor can you. He sees you in a way that you’ve never been seen before. He beckons you nearer, inviting trust in what he is revealing. He speaks your name. “Go,” he urges.
Mary Magdalene went to the disciples and cried out: “I have seen the Lord!”
Going Deeper Together:
- Place yourself in Mary Magdalene’s position. Is there something that you are being called to do in your life at this moment? A choice or decision of importance? As you turn and face the Gardener, what do you see there in Jesus’ eyes? What does he want you to know beyond the shadow of a doubt as you contemplate this task before you?
- Jesus speaks Mary Magdalene’s name and she immediately knows him. Do you need to hear Jesus speak your name in the same way? Spend time in prayer with this longing. Does Jesus have a special name for you? Do you have a special name for him? Ponder this. Sometimes the intimacy of a nickname can remove barriers to our vulnerability in prayer.
- Pray with John 20: 11-18. Imagine yourself as a third party observing the story unfold. Notice what you are noticing. See what comes up for you. Stay with that, explore it, and talk to Jesus about what is evoked.
- Listen to the song, Mary Magdalene, by Ashley Lagunas as she shares a version of what happened in the garden between Mary Magdalene and Jesus. If the imagery distracts, close your eyes and just listen to the words and take your response to Jesus.
- How are you experiencing the joy of Easter today? Reflect on the questions Monique invites us to consider this week. How do you feel as Jesus calls your name? How do you respond?
Photo by Mads Schmidt Rasmussen on Unsplash
Monique Jacobs
Monique Jacobs has been engaged in professional active ministry in the church for 40+ years, offering workshops, retreats, and writing. She accompanies people in these roles, and as a Spiritual Director, using Ignatian methods and spirituality. Her joy is to serve as mentor and companion to others, highlighting their gifts and helping to build up the body of Christ. Monique also hosts a YouTube Channel: Finding God in All Things, new videos posted weekly. Monique serves as the Director of Mission and Identity for Catholic Charities of Northern Nevada. Subscribe to Monique’s YouTube Channel, Finding God In All Things.
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