There was a woman on a seashore walking and looking for a starfish. For years she dreamed of finding a big full starfish to add to her collection of seashells and driftwood. As she walked along the shore, she gathered beautiful fragments of shell and wood that she admired. She gathered so many fragments that her hands and pockets began to fill with these small beauties. She had been collecting all afternoon until miraculously, she saw hundreds of starfish floating. Her eyes gleamed and her friend motioned to her, go grab yourself a starfish. She looked longingly out to the starfish and then down to her hands and pockets that were filled with fragments. She had no room to grab and collect the starfish. She stood paralyzed discerning what to let go of so that she might have the freedom to collect what her heart desired.
Freedom is a complicated and nuanced word with many meanings. Sometimes, when we say freedom we mean freedom from something that binds us or stops us from doing something. Other times, we seek freedom to do something incredible.
As we begin 2025 (which feels like a made up year to me), God is calling me to freedom — to create something incredible. As we enter this new time within a new place, God invites us to freedom so that we might love, work, lead, befriend, etc. in a new way. Even when things worked in years past, God makes us new again.
As I consider my family, my health, my jobs, where and what is God calling me to say no so that I might say yes, I keep wondering, am I holding shells when God is presenting me with a starfish? For example, as my daughters lean into the last years of college, God invites me to let go of some shells of parenting that are no longer needed for me. Too, as I lean anew into this new year, God invites me to let go of old ways that no longer work for me.
In the second week of the Spiritual Exercises, St. Ignatius provides us with meditations to help us discern our call and evaluate our freedom. It is called “The Meditation on Three Types of People”. Ignatius invites us to consider these three people who all desire freedom. I keep pondering these three types of people, the woman with a starfish, and my own call to create something incredible.
The first person wants interior freedom but really never gets around to speaking to God about it, so continues to live her life. The shells and fragments continue to gather and she never gets to the starfish. I, like many, might hear God calling to let go of old ways of family and work, but because the newness feels uncomfortable to myself or others, I avoid the work and joy of looking for the new ways–the starfish that God has for me.
The second person desires freedom as well. She makes her own decisions and then asks God after the decisions to bless what has already been decided. She decides what shells and fragments she can let go of without consulting God and with great reluctance. She negotiates often, and her time is filled with “shoulds” and “woulds” and worry and angst. Often, she is even happy, but joy and fulfillment often elude her. “If I let go of this shell, do I have another like it at home?” “This shell is so beautiful, how could I let it go?” Even, “This shell was given to me so long ago, and it has sat for decades in this pocket — I can’t imagine living without it.” In hearing God’s call to make changes in my family, friendships, and work, I decide on my own what works best. Maybe, it is the change that is easiest or causes the least deonance in my life, so I choose which shells I let go of on my own. After I choose, I ask for God’s blessing, but I feel incomplete and exhausted because I have not depended on God.
The third person desires freedom like the first and second, but she abandons herself completely to God. She empties her pockets, peace fills her lungs, the gift of freedom fills her, and she runs to see the beauty of the starfish. With God’s lead, I feel the peace and joy of freedom as I pick up the starfish. Often, this kind of moment takes patience in my life as I wait for God’s voice to lead me. Too, this movement invites me to say no to things that have grown comfortable in my life. The yes means I grieve some “no’s,” but the peace and joy of the starfish lifts me into this motion.
We are always changing. We are made, in fact, to change and follow God as God grows and prunes our life. Change causes discomfort, but change is necessary.
These changes happen even when we do not pay attention to them or try to avoid them. St. Ignatius invites us to consider that God is working with us and inviting us to this freedom.
Interior freedom where we abandon our own need to hold too tightly to our life and offer ourselves to God who knows us and loves us so dearly is the core of our relationship with God.
Often, like the woman in the story, God provides starfish, things that seem impossible in our human ambition. Let God free you and show something incredible.
As you reflect on this year, where is God offering you the hope of freedom? What is the starfish God is sending you? Are your hands empty enough to pick it up? What fragments must you discard so that freedom might fill you? What must you grieve so that you are able to pick up the starfish that God is offering you? What do you fear in the changes that God is inviting you into?
Going Deeper:
- Reflect on Meditation on the Three Classes of Persons by Kevin O’Brien, SJ
- Take a few moments to pray through the questions Stephanie shares at the end of her blog.
Photo by: Pedro Lastra on Unsplash
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Stephanie
Clouatre Davis
Stephanie Clouatre Davis graduated from Loyola University New Orleans. Stephanie speaks to adults and teens around the nation at parishes, high schools, and dioceses in various venues including retreats and conferences. With humor, joy, and stories, Stephanie not only fully engages her audiences but also inspires them to challenge themselves and build a stronger relationship with God. She lives in Covington, Louisiana with her husband Michael and two girls Emma and Abby.
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