Encountering God - In Stumbling and Fumbling

Disco balls, blaring music, and neon decor. If you have not visited a roller skating rink in the past few decades, you may be shocked by the sense of familiarity and constancy that pervades. Over the Christmas holidays, several rainy Southern California days left the kids needing to get out of the house and burn off energy. An internet search led me to a roller rink that had remained largely unchanged for the past 50 years. For a nominal fee, we could get the kids out of the rain and off the couch for up to three hours.

After lacing and buckling skates and various pieces of protective gear, the kids set off while I sat on the neon carpeted couch surrounded by various tennis shoes and water bottles. Soon they each settled into a groove and grew more comfortable on wheels. As I watched the endless parade of people moving in circles, I realized there were a lot of spiritual lessons to be learned at the roller rink.

1. Round and Round:

There is no beginning or end at the roller rink. With benches all along the periphery, skaters just jump in wherever they find a spot to dump their belongings. The kids would make a few circles and then stop for a drink, a rest, or to adjust their skates. When they were ready, they would just jump back into the flow of people. No one was winning or in the lead. There was no ringleader instructing people on how frequently to stop and rest. How often in life have I gotten caught up in the day-to-day activity, focusing on the next thing to be accomplished? The parents on the sidelines were anchor points, reminding kids they had permission to stop and rest, and did not need to stay caught in the endless loop. I too must choose to stop and rest. Sabbath days, however we choose to acknowledge them, offer regular invitations to pause and evaluate our own mental, physical, and spiritual well-being.

2. You WILL Fall:

My daughter took off flying around the rink without hesitation. She fell several times, and there were a few tears over the course of the afternoon, but she kept getting back up and starting again. Among the other skaters, I saw knee, elbow, and wrist pads along with helmets and every kind of protective gear imaginable, as well as the skaters who just risked it all and took to the rink unadorned. I saw confident skaters take tumbles as their own kids pulled them down while grasping for a hand. One talented girl kept attempting complex tricks, only to then be tripped by the younger, less-experienced skaters. When you throw dozens of people on wheels together in a tight space, no matter how confident you might feel, accidents can and will happen. We might look ridiculous at times, or feel the bruising the next day. We expect perfection of ourselves, we hold back and do not allow ourselves to participate wholeheartedly in life.

3. The Journey is the Destination:

At a roller rink, the journey together is the whole point. Going with their cousins, trying something new, and allowing themselves to fail is part of it. There is no destination. No one is going to compete in a roller derby or join a hockey team, but with each lap, I saw the kids grow in confidence and comfort. Now that we are back in the endless loop of school assignments, play rehearsals, and swim practice, I need to remember that the journey is the destination. I am not counting down the days until the next break, but savoring each chance for our family to learn, grow, and even fail together.

In this ordinary time between the Christmas season and Lent, I can appreciate anew that God appears to me in the stumbling and fumbling imperfection of my day-to-day life. God did not come to be an audience member in my solo master performance, waiting for the curtain to rise and for me to wow everyone with my capabilities. God has come into the world to walk (or even skate) alongside me. He invites me to stop and rest when I am tired. He encourages me to take risks and He allows me to grab onto His arm when I feel myself stumbling and falling. And just like the kids at the rink, we are laughing together and enjoying ourselves along the way.

Going Deeper

• Sometimes lacing up our skates looks like starting over in our prayer practice. Allow God to give you a fresh start in prayer with the encouragement found in Ignatian Prayer Adventure.

• The round and round, day to day can feel void of God’s presence at times. In Making a List with Vinita Hampton Wright, accept the challenge to find creativity in the everyday, even in making a to-do list.

• Notice how other Into the Deep writers articulate their invitations to Encounter God. Who is God to you right now? How is God showing up for you or for those you accompany? Where is God in your journey? How are you walking (or skating) together?

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Photo by Jimmy Liu on Unsplash.

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Jen Coito

Jen Coito was Jesuit-educated in Los Angeles at Loyola Marymount University. She has a Masters in Pastoral Theology with a specialization in Spiritual Direction. After working for the California Province of Jesuits and Christian Life Community, Jen and Fr. Tri Dinh, S.J co-founded Christus Ministries, an outreach that bridges young adults and the Church through service, retreats, and leadership formation experiences. Jen also serves the Sisters of Notre Dame in California as the Associate Director of Mission Advancement. Daily life involves juggling her work with awesome nuns and the constant stream of activities with her husband Jason and three children.